A Crazy Girl is Given Crazy Love

This morning I awoke fully rested for the first time in almost a week. The last few days with Sweetness was pretty intense as were our conversations. We'd start the evening with talks about us, but next thing we knew, we were laughing and making jokes and just having the greatest time ever. Although there's still a great amount of uncertainty, its still feels a great weight has been lifted.
Hell, I myself am still just a little all over the place. But the one thing that keeps popping into my head was something so incredibly simple that he said.
"I just want you"
It pretty much came from nowhere. I've always thought that I wanted someone to need me, but since he said that, I don't know, I've been thinking about it. Its kind of like out of all the options that are in front of him, the one he keeps coming back to is...me. And looking back, his struggles have been about just that. He said he wanted to "keep his options open" by dating other people and staying out of relationships. But he kept wondering how and trying to find ways to keep me in his life. He never wanted me to leave, go away, or be taken away. He later said something to the effect of that he wonders now if he wasn't just wanting to keep the option of dating out of stubborn-ness. Who knows. Nothing's really been decided yet. Although I like that he's making future plans with me again.
And I can't get over the way he says "I love you".
I'm used to us saying it between us as we've been friends for awhile (You know, one of those quick "love ya" types). The other night he kept softly repeating it... "I love you. I love you. God, I love you. So much, I love you."
He kept on for a bit, each time putting more and more emphasis on "love" and then on "you". Then "I really love you". It was insane. I've never heard him speak so soft and sweet and sincere before.
Just gotta keep my head on straight for now, though.
*sigh*
I love him too...

Snow Day!

Well, it snowed. FINALLY!  We got measureable snow fall! I was so excited. I even got up late at night to watch the snow fall freshly on the ground. It was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. Being outside in the back yard, in the chilly stillness of the night while everyone else cuddled up warmly in their beds. Just me and the gentle sound of the snow falling. It was absolutely amazing! The feel of the tiny flakes falling on my cheeks, being able to scoop up a bit of snow in my hands and run my fingers over the cold, tiny, white beads. I even walked out to the front of the house and saw the street completely covered in a thin veil of pure white, devoid of footsteps or dirty tire marks. A beautiful solid sheet of snow glowing in the night. I went back to bed with frozen, cherry-red cheeks and a smile on my face.
Of course, not everyone in my area had as great of a night. One highway found itself with a 50 car pile-up. Yup FIFTY cars...Sounds like great times. And in a town where snow fall is extremely rare, you better believe the whole area was completely shut down. Very few people had to report to work. Kids everywhere were elated to have a 3-day weekend and a few hours to play in the snow.
I spent my time baking. My house was filled with the scents of brownies, cookies and banana bread. Another plus is the gas oven kept the house pretty warm and comfortable. I greeted this evening with a bowl of Chicken Tortilla soup- one of my personal favorites. And later, I shall bid this perfect day adieu with a cup of Mexican hot chocolate and a little indulgence in my fresh-baked goodies. All in all it was a wonderful day!