My brain is full...

Well, I know I've been "silent" lately. I actually have a lot going on. Though there are plenty of nights where I feel like banging my head on the wall and I thank Lady Max for helping restore my sanity/common sense/calmness during this private-for-now matter. I think listening to the sweetness in her voice, alone, helps a great deal.

So, besides work and such, I've been reading again. I bought a few books MONTHS ago that have gone untouched 'til now. Unfortunately with one, I started reading it only to find it was not as interesting as I initially thought it would be.
I've tried writing again, but alas, remained blocked. Ideas easily come only to flit away just the same.
I have been watching movies that make me laugh. A lot. So far 1) Office Space 2) Swingers --of course 3) Going the Distance... OK so all of these movies have Ron Livingston in them, I just realized. He is gorgeous though...very. I still have a thing for Adrien Brody the most. I don't know what that is...the aqualine nose, the scrawny yet masculine frame, the soft voice, the goofy expressions that say 'Hey, I'm human'. I'm workin' on figuring that out.

And then I've been thinking about my relationship history. I just want to finally bring it all out and deal with it and move the f*ck on. If you can, bear with me as I start this journey of self-healing through re-discovery. As mentioned, I've always been quite appreciative of all the wonderful support and feedback from the readers that remain :)

Ex #1
I was 18. He was 19. I thought he was so incredibly wonderful and he thought I was adorable and funny. It was the first time I had felt like I "connected" with someone. We had so much in common and, well, when you're young, the first time you "love" someone, you think the world is just beginning. The first few months were amazing. We laughed, we talked, we saw movies together, walked through bookstores together, and watched The Simpsons together over the phone. When we met, he had just gotten over his ex whom he caught sleeping with his roommate. We went away for a weekend to celebrate Valentine's day late (he was working and I was in college). After we checked-in to our hotel and got settled in our room, he pulled out a heart-shaped Ring Pop, got down on one knee and proposed to me. After saying 'yes', he kissed me and told me that he would give me the real ring I deserved when he could afford to. I said I didn't care about that. We cuddled in bed and talked of our future. He asked if we could start a family right away. He was looking forward to having children with me. We both hoped they were fiery red-heads like him. That night he became the first person I gave myself to. It was a big deal for me.
About a month or so later, he stopped coming around and calling as much. When we talked, he seemed distant, tired, depressed and just like he was having a hard time. He started working two jobs and didn't have much time...apparently to the point where he just disappeared without warning. I called and called never to get a response and after about a week and a half, I realized there was no finding him again.
OK, not so dramatically, I did find him again a few years later while dating the guy I started dating after him, through the magic of Myspace. I sent him a message basically saying: "Hi, remember me?"
He responded with a longer message apologizing for what he did. Supposedly he fell on really hard times, the kind where even working two jobs still wasn't keeping him on his feet. I became friends with the girl he was dating then (later, she would become his wife). She didn't know he and I were exes, and one day she began opening up to me about problems they were having, she was worried because he extensively cheated on every girl he dated. When they started seeing each other, he apparently gave her a break-down of his past. She even described his and my relationship and the sordid details of his affairs...which he had slept with someone before AND after proposing to me. Yup, my first 'love' didn't really love me. Even though it hurt to find that out, I was happy I moved on. 

Is He Really 'Forever My Friend, Forever My Love'?

Ok, well, Sweetness and I have remained "friends". I put added the quotation marks because, well, its like we're still in a relationship. We still spend alot of time together. He's even mentioned that he sees me as "more than a friend". He still calls me Love and "my love" and says I love you. And I don't think its to take advantage of me and how much I love him. I think its that he actually does feel the way he says about me. He still gets VERY emotional at times when we talk. I know the sound of him when he's been crying. He gets like that often when we talk. During one of his emotional breakdowns he even mentioned that he still thinks about us and me and what he's missing out on by not being able to be in a relationship.

I suggested to him that he's depressed. He said if finally hit him that he is. He's been trying to work through it and heal. Who knows.

I just know that I'm not letting him effect what I need to do for myself. But he's still an amazing support system for me and I for him. He's cried with me when I broke down about what I have going on in other areas of my life. He's text me randomly during the day that he's worried about me. He's tried to cheer me up and do/say things that he knows will make me laugh. He's been amazing lately and admittedly more like himself than he was when we were together. That does make me happy for him.

The one weird thing is how he gets when I talk about Buddy. Its like he feels that he can't live up to the ghost, the memory of Buddy. That's just not true. Its like he has to compete with him or that I don't love him as much as I love/d Buddy. Again, not true. Its just awkward. Its like Sweetness doesn't feel like he's good enough for me. I said to him once: Its not what kind of/how much baggage we have, its how we deal with it. So, if he feels he isn't good enough for me, he's not. Ya know? I guess like self-fulfilling prophecy. But then again, the only person he should feel good enough for is himself.

Things Get Worse....

Before they get better. I'm hoping that's the case. Left and right parts of my life just keep falling apart. Its starting to take its toll. I've been really trying to stay positive but its getting harder. And I definitely want to deal with things, but with so much going on, its difficult to decide which to deal with first. I know the last thing I need to deal with is Sweetness breaking up with me. That's been put on the back burner since other problems involve more than just me. But it is a major adjustment. When something happens, I pick up the phone, but then I remember I can't go running to him anymore. That kinda makes me feel alone and ache alllll over again.
I'm hoping that with Halloween tomorrow, I can just take a night to relax and enjoy the fun and excitement the night brings.

Back to Square One

Well, we had a long break-up. At least it was the longest break-up I've ever had. My other relationships ended when the guys stopped talking to me...pretty much after a week of not hearing from them I realized it was over.
With Sweetness, we spent a lot of time talking and crying. Yes, we both cried. I'm thinking for different reasons. Mine being, well, because I'm heartbroken. Him, probably because he's still feeling "fucked up". He kept apologizing for everything. I eventually had to tell him to stop since it wasn't exactly helping the situation. I've cried since then, but honestly, not as much as I thought I would. I mean, I know I felt it coming but, I was really in love with him so I thought it would be harder. *shrug* I don't know. Maybe I'm just too tired to grieve.
He said that he just didn't see our relationship working out. He feels that its all him because of how messed up he is still. He thinks I'm amazing. He doesn't know exactly what happened. He said in the beginning he was really happy. Probably the most happy he'd ever been but then something just stopped making him happy. He started getting anxiety over us and didn't trust the relationship. BUT he still loves me. Eh. I just know he wasn't happy. It doesn't matter what the reason is I guess.
Anyway, I don't know where I'm going from here. I haven't made up my mind yet as to what's next. I think I won't date for quite a long time. I'm tired of being dumped. We'll see what happens from here.

The Obvious

He broke up with me.

As Summer Faded, So Did He

He's been slipping away for sometime now. We talk less and less. When we do talk, he cuts our conversations short. I can't even tell you what goes through my mind, what I think it means that he's passing up opportunites to spend time with me. I don't like feeling insecure. I won't. I'm going to have to lay it on the table and hope his reactions are honest.
You know, its not just with me that he's different. His whole life seems different. He used to be all about healthy eating and ate a certain way and would always tell me about the foods he was making. He would get excited when he found something new and nutritious to add to his menu. Enthusiasm is all gone from even that. I miss his random bursts of energy. It used to put a smile on my face when he would talk about his new discoveries.
I don't know. I wish I knew what was going on with him. With us.

I've spent time focusing on myself. I've done lots of things for me, things that always make me happy, but at the end of the day, he's still there, dangling by a thread in front of me and I come back to square one. I honestly don't know which should win out "fight or flight".

When Crazy has Issues

Its been awhile.
Things had been going ok, but I don't know. I'm having that feeling again that Sweetness might leave me. I had been so very happy with each day spent with him. And the same for him. One night, he even told me he wants to marry me.
But, then he said something last night, during a moment that should've been sweet and happy, and that has made me feel insecure. I'm sure he didn't mean anything by what he said. At the time I brushed it off and continued on, but thinking back upon it now, I feel a tightening in my chest. I actually want to cry thinking about it. And maybe I'm making it into a bigger deal than it is. Who knows. Last night, he also asked me if I was happy (despite all the other personal stuff happening). I told him I was and asked why he asked that. He said that he's scared that he doesn't make me happy. He doesn't know how much he does make me happy.
Ugh. I don't know.
I'm taking it as a bad sign that when I brought up that I'm having some issues, he said we'd talk and I've yet to hear from him. Last time I felt this way, things almost did end.
Maybe I'm just tired.

"Everyone Knows How This Old Story Goes"

The kid is serious about me, but he still has issues.
So, all day and last night I was agonizing over not talking to him. I thought if I could just make it through to tonight, I'll call/text him then to see if he wants to finally talk. I figured if he hadn't broken down yet and text/called me, then he's not having as hard of a time as I am and maybe this space is good for him.

Yeah, turns out not so much.
Sweetness sent me a text letting it allllll out. And it wasn't pretty...He couldn't even call me because he was too "emotional". At first, I honestly thought that was an excuse. Admittedly, I went back to Mr. X and how he just rejected my call and sent me to voicemail where didn't have to deal with me. But when I finally got him to call me, I could tell he was emotional. So, he was upset about my reaction the other day. And he thought that I was doing to him what every other woman has - left him. He thought that's what I was doing by giving him space. I explained my side, how I saw things and he explained his. I think we both cried (nobody knows who he is so I don't think its emasculating to mention that...). We went through just about every emotion. Yeah, over what seemed like such a small incident. I had to remind him that I'm NOT his ex-girlfriend so he shouldn't assume that I'm going to be like her. That clicked with him and he apologized for it and for everything. He said he knows I'm not. I'm so much better than that. Our love is nothing like what they had. I think he said something to the effect that with her all he did was give, give, give. And our relationship isn't like that at all. He may have cried a little more...
And I realized that I'm still having trouble letting him be there for me. I mean thats why I got irritated at his joke to begin with. It was at a time when I was dealing with what I have going on and I knew he didn't know that but I felt like I couldn't turn to him because he was at work. He realized that too. And by the time I was ready to talk to him, after all the days events happened and I thought about it and processed it he was already so upset and closed off, I just couldn't talk to him then.
We both just have to be more patient with the other and if we want this relationship to work out, we have to help eachother work through our issues.
He made a statement about how up until this point everything was so easy and it shouldn't be hard. And I told him that of course there are going to be good days and bad days. We are going to have hiccups. Especially in the beginning, especially after all he had been through. It would just be silly to think everything about us would be easy. He felt stupid for even thinking walking away, leaving me, was an option.
We talked for about 3 hours. The conversation just got increasingly better and better. And even though he said he loved me several times during our conversation, he finally said it the way that I love, that makes me melt. So softly and sweetly like it was his first time saying it. AND he used a word he normally doesn't. Never. He said: "I will never get sick of anything about you".
We'll see.
Until then we're still learning about each other in the context of a relationship. We need to know boundaries, issues, hang-ups, and hurdles that need to be dealt with and deal with them like rational adults. Or at least try to.

Yeah...great start to my week...

Well, I don't have anyone to talk to about it, so here I am.
Yesterday, Sweetness made a joke that I thought was in bad taste. Normally I don't care, I'll blow it off and laugh about it anyway. But it happened at an inopportune time. I don't know if I blew things out of porportion or if my reaction was wrong. I basically let him know I didn't like what he did and then just told him to have a nice day. So that evening he asked if I was OK and if there was anything I wanted to talk about. I said there wasn't and he said ok. I thought that was that. He kept giving me one word answers so I told him if HE needed to talk I was there. He said he didn't want to. This morning was the same thing. He was being so short with me. Finally I told him to be out with it. He said it was him and that I shouldn't worry about it. I said I wouldn't push him to tell me, but I am here if he changes his mind. He said: "I already decided I wasn't going to talk to you about it. I'm going to have an amazing day. I suggest you do the same."
That hurt me alot. So I told him I'm going to leave him alone for a few days and if he needs me, he knows where to find me. I have a feeling he's going to break up with me. I don't know why. I just feel it.

Telepath or Still My Original Blog Stalker?

I swear not even two minutes after publishing my post last night, Sweetness text me. Either he really sensed I needed him or he is (still) reading my blog and just not telling me. Ass.
He asked if I was still awake and then asked if I wanted to talk on the phone for a bit since he had time before dinner with his family. He spent his days off from work this week with them.
I told him that I didn't want to interrupt his time he should be spending with his family since he doesn't see them too often..especially his father. All he responded was, "OK. I love you."
Reading "I love you." made me wanna hear his voice so bad. I missed him terribly. So I told him I changed my mind about talking. A few minutes passed and...Nada. I figured he was upset so I dozed off. Apparently he just left his phone charging in one room whilst hanging out in another. When he finally read my texts, the last of which said, "OK. Well, I love you too. Enjoy your dinner" He thought something bad had happened. I don't know if it was because of me or not, but he wound up staying awake all night. I, myself, had slept for a bit then did laundry in the middle of the night. THAT stressed.
So mid-morning he text me to ask if everything was OK and to apologize for leaving me hanging basically. I assured him things were OK. He said that he figured that I just didn't want to talk. I had to correct. I told him that it wasn't that I didn't want to talk to him, it was that I didn't want to interrupt time he should spend with his family. I may not be big on my family but I'm never one to get in the way of other's. He responded:
"Aww babe! Why? I know you're considerate...but, ugh =( I wouldn't have asked..."

He had asked before that if he could call but I didn't see it and thus didn't respond to it so then he took that to mean I just didn't want to talk...again.

"We'll just talk later I guess"
"K. Enjoy your day" (Not really understanding what he meant at first)
"I hope you're OK. Sure. You too."
"If you want to talk I'm available whenever you are." (after realizing...)

I barely hit send and his call came in. I answered and he sounded tired. I felt bad. Until I heard him softly and sweetly say, "Baby, I love you sooooooo much". We talked for a bit and he made me laugh, feel safe and warm and was everything I needed last night.
And then it hit me and I told him. Its not that he's not there for me, or even that I'm not aware he is, its just that I'm not used to having that. I need to learn to let him be there. I'm used to wanting the other person to be there while just being independent and dealing on my own.
This relationship is so very different, not just for him. Me too. Me too.

Its official!!!

So my day started out good. The not-so-good I'm choosing to leave out. I'd like to focus on what made me feel great and is getting me through this time.

I love when I get texts from Sweetness. There were a couple of concerns that needed ironing out and we accomplished this. Then, in true Sweetness fashion...

Sweetness: Thank you for putting me at ease
Me: Always. Come to me when you need to, NO hesitations
Sweetness: There's one tiny little thing
Me: Ok.
Sweetness: Promise you won't get mad?
Me: I'll try not to. I hate making promises like that.
Sweetness: Baby. Please. Promise??
Me: Grr...fine.
Sweetness: Be my girl...officially? :)
Me (pissed, but surprised and happy): Of course!! Jerk.

And then the rest of the convo was just being happy that I am his girlfriend and he is my boyfriend. Hmm...typing that out for the first time is...I don't have words for it. Exciting. Happy. Strange.
I mean, that last word...I never expected us to get to this point and it seems like such a major step for us. He said that he felt great about us, but was also scared. I said that I think that was just a part of beginning any relationship and he said that he has never been scared before. I don't know what to think of that. But then he went on to say that he was happy to have the best relationship of his life and...

Sweetness: For the first time I'm in love with someone who's good for me.

That really just made my day. For me, I just feel that for the first time, I'm in love with someone who is in love with me back. I honestly feel that he truly is in love with me. He's done nothing but prove it to me over and over again.
I'm amused at how we've gone about being in a relationship all "wrong"... first we decide we should live together, then we realize we're in love and NOW we're boyfriend/girlfriend?? I guess whatever works!!
Now, if everything else goes well, I'll be a completely happy crazy girl.

A Crazy Girl is Given Crazy Love

This morning I awoke fully rested for the first time in almost a week. The last few days with Sweetness was pretty intense as were our conversations. We'd start the evening with talks about us, but next thing we knew, we were laughing and making jokes and just having the greatest time ever. Although there's still a great amount of uncertainty, its still feels a great weight has been lifted.
Hell, I myself am still just a little all over the place. But the one thing that keeps popping into my head was something so incredibly simple that he said.
"I just want you"
It pretty much came from nowhere. I've always thought that I wanted someone to need me, but since he said that, I don't know, I've been thinking about it. Its kind of like out of all the options that are in front of him, the one he keeps coming back to is...me. And looking back, his struggles have been about just that. He said he wanted to "keep his options open" by dating other people and staying out of relationships. But he kept wondering how and trying to find ways to keep me in his life. He never wanted me to leave, go away, or be taken away. He later said something to the effect of that he wonders now if he wasn't just wanting to keep the option of dating out of stubborn-ness. Who knows. Nothing's really been decided yet. Although I like that he's making future plans with me again.
And I can't get over the way he says "I love you".
I'm used to us saying it between us as we've been friends for awhile (You know, one of those quick "love ya" types). The other night he kept softly repeating it... "I love you. I love you. God, I love you. So much, I love you."
He kept on for a bit, each time putting more and more emphasis on "love" and then on "you". Then "I really love you". It was insane. I've never heard him speak so soft and sweet and sincere before.
Just gotta keep my head on straight for now, though.
*sigh*
I love him too...

An End is Almost at Hand

First, I would like to thank one of my readers for taking the time to give some much needed (and very much appreciated) advice.
Second, I just wanna note how odd it is to write about a situation that is so current/ongoing. I guess with Mr. X I was used to writing about all that had already happened instead of what just happened and what might happen. And too, I don't know how he'd feel about me blogging about our "business". Its all anon so I hope thats ok. This is the best place for me to vent or unload my mind instead of going back to him a million times over with the same thing.

Which brings me to my current state. I let Sweetness know that I would email him some of my feelings and concerns. I was so tired of sitting on things/issues and wanted them out in the open for us to discuss and conclude upon. He sent me a text that he did receive and read my email but needed time to respond so as to gather his thoughts. And he said he was thinking alot about me.
Yup.
That's a little scary. Its almost exactly what Mr. X said so long ago when we were on the (at the time unknown to me) brink of departing.
So, I've been preparing myself for a new separation from yet another best friend with whom things have gotten too complicated. I don't even know if that's right to expect the worst. To expect that he would just leave me. But it just feels like the most logical conclusion. If that's how it goes, it will hurt. A lot. But at the same time, I still just want us both to be happy. Even if that means moving on from eachother. I don't know. My mind is in a strange place where its blank and all over the place at the same time. We'll see how it turns out.
Thank you to all who've lent support and words to me in this super crazy time! I'm always appreciative of my readers and commentors. :)

Open Letter to My Best Friend, My Sweetness

This is something I've been working on for a while. Its sat in my "Drafts" folder while I kept adding and taking away from it. Something tells me its the right time to post this. I'm almost pretty sure My Sweetness doesn't read my blog anymore. If he does, I sure hope he'll tell me. None of this is new to him so...


Dear "Fry",
I love you. You say that you love me. We each want what's best for the other. We've started something. We've ended it. We've decided to let things be. We've been back and forth on what we are and what could be. You say you are too damaged for a "relationship". You could never put trust in another person like you did with her because you don't want anybody (even me) to hurt you the way she has. You say that you aren't as strong as I am.
I don't think that I'm strong. I come with baggage too. But I don't compare you to anybody. I don't assume you'll be like Mr. X. When you say "I love you", I believe it. I trust it. I know it. I do it because I don't want to be the only person I trust. I do it because you've seen me at my worst, and I, you. We've pulled eachother out of the depths of hell. Yes, there is alot of hurt and pain out there. But there is also love and warmth and happiness. In order to truly find it, you have to let go and open yourself to the possibility. ALL of the possibilities. I believe that to really love you must be willing to hurt. And that's just who I am.
I don't expect you to change. Its ok if you don't. I know that you will never wake up one morning and confirm your thought that I could be "the one". I never expect you to say again that I'm someone you could see yourself marrying. Its not gonna happen. But am I unhappy? No. Do I still want to be here? Yes.
I've been close to leaving before. I just wanted to turn and walk away from you. From everything. All I was looking at was the bad. I felt like you didn't need me. I felt that maybe I was expecting those things from you. Maybe I was expecting you to want to be with me. I felt that I was holding you back and you didn't want that for us. You shouldn't limit yourself. You should "explore your options".  I felt like leaving because when you said you don't think you could ever be in a relationship again, that you were just saying you just didn't want a relationship with me. I was allowing my past to interfere with my future. Especially since this happened after you thought we should try to have a relationship. But when I thought about not having you in my life, that idea hurt more than anything you could do/say. How is that? Well, if I walked away, I would never know what might've happened. I would rather throw caution to the wind and maybe we could have the greatest life together or maybe you hurt me. Maybe I hurt you (although I never want to). The truth is we just don't know. And I want to find out. We also promised to ALWAYS be a part of eachother's lives. I don't want to hurt you like that, by breaking a promise. Maybe you will heal from your heartache. Maybe you freaked out about us that one night because maybe I'm just not the one. Maybe you'll meet someone who will make you want to love with wreckless abandon. Someone who will make you either forget or just not care about what happened in the past. As much as I wish I could be that person for you, maybe I'm not. I don't know. Sometimes I think that when someone is the absolute most perfect person for you, you know. Just know. No matter where you are, what's happened to you. You know. I could be wrong. It could be different for everybody. But its not going to stop me from loving you the way that I do, as much as I do. You will always have my support 100%. You will always, at least, be my (best) friend, even if I can never be your love.

Love always,
"Leela"

*I do not own the rights to the above image.

When Neither Sleeping nor Waking are Beneficial

Its such a beautiful day again today. Its been pouring almost non-stop since last night. I actually fell asleep listening to the rain. I had a couple of glasses of wine, turned off the lights, turned on some soft music, opened the blinds, relaxed....then next thing I know...Zzzzzz
Sexy
Until...
I had a dream last night. Well, I have dreams every night but last night was a recurring dream. Ok, well I shouldn't say that. I've had it once before.
The problem with it is that its partly about the ex best friend of mine that I've mentioned before. The one that left me heartbroken with his douchebaggery. That dream pretty much came out of nowhere too. I hadn't thought about him for a few weeks. You can ask my sweetness (one guy who will always be a constant in my life!! He needs a nick name...). He stalks this blog! Ha ha! Kidding! I love you, buddy!
And I had gotten rid of everything that reminds me of Douchey McGee (ex bff)- pictures, all his cute texts and emails. deleted him from my messenger (as I already figured he blocked me from his- he lives on that damn thing). Anyway so I went through the usual "friend purge". And I had dreamt of him before, a few weeks ago. I had a problem where most nights I would dream about him coming to me and basically breaking down in front of me. He would just sit there and cry and cry and cry on my shoulder while I held him. Then it progressed to him crying and saying "I'm so sorry" over and over and over. Well, those finally subsided, much to my relief.
Last night I had this dream where I was initially walking through this unfamiliar, yet dimly lit shopping mall. It was full of stores I had never seen/heard of before. I'm walking around with a sort of empty/lonely feeling just looking at everything. It seems as if I'm just going through the motions of shopping. I pop into a couple of stores. I start feeling even more lonely as well as bored and cold. as I'm walking around I see a set of double-doors that leads to an outside courtyard. I approach them and as I push them open I'm blinded by a bright light that is unbearable. I shield my eyes from the light as I blindly stumble outside. I slowly begin to open my eyes, braced for the intensity of the light only to find that the light has adjusted itself and is a normal sunny day. I look around a a few groups of people, either sitting at some tables or standing around. They are all talking and laughing and having a good time. It fills me with sadness and makes me feel like I don't belong. I just begin to wander around and see off in the distance someone sitting by the edge of a lake that is backed by a huge snow-covered mountain. I start walking towards this person as they are the only one aside from me that is alone. As I get close I recognize this person immediately. Its Douchey. Even though there is no sound in this dream (which is odd for me) I know that I call his name as I feel my mouth move. He quickly turns around, smiles big and gets up. He runs over toward me. Grabs me in a huge embrace. I close my eyes and bury my head in his neck and take in his scent. When we pull apart, he takes my hand and leads me back to the lake where we sit with our feet in the water and talk and look at the mountain. The conversation seems pleasant as we laugh occassionally and give shy glances. Then I stand up, slide my shoes on and he stands up as well. We look at eachother for a moment and then he pulls me in for a huge hug and kisses me. I walk away and look back a few times to see him watching me leave.
The second part of the dream is different from the first time. The details the second time around are fuzzy. But basically that is it. And its frustrating. Oh well.
And then I have actual man problems. I think.
I met this guy a couple of weeks ago. He's sweet, very kind, funny.
Not too long after I met him he told me that he sees us married by next summer. I only wish I could've seen my own face at that. We had a talk.
Things after that were good. Hanging out, talking alot...that sort of thing. I don't know why it bothers me the way he gets excited around me or talking to me. Its not in a creepy way or anything. I don't know.
Then yesterday we started the day with our usual texting while he's at work. Half way through the day it just stops. I was expecting him to call me but when he didn't I just wanted to make sure he was ok. I called him and instead of just ringing and getting his voicemail I get a message (the pre-recorded kinds from the operator) that his phone isn't accepting calls. So I shrug it off. He calls me later that night, I don't answer since I don't know the number. He leaves a voicemail. It says that he's calling from his cousin's phone because his isn't working. Leaves me his cousin's number in case I need to reach him for anything and apologizes for it. Hmm.. I don't know what to think of that. *sigh*
At least my wine was good.