The title for this post will make sense in a bit.
I really hate being dragged into someone else's drama.
I mean seriously, a person I haven't seen for over 10 years is using the fact that we are "friends" to start drama between two of my other friends. Nice one.
So, all that is just bringing me down lately. Its horrible for this person to tell a lie about me in order to push these two people apart from eachother out of jealousy and bitterness. It just seems so childish. And it is. I just can't fathom someone doing something like that at this stage of life. Or, well, ever.
I just have to roll my eyes and remind my friends that if they automatically believe what they are being told instead of talking to the other person in question then its just not worth it to me to fight for the friendship. Is that harsh?
Eh, well its just all so confusing lately. I don't necessarily hold grudges, I'll let things go, but I won't forgive and I cut the person out of my life. And it sucks to have to be doing that now. I love my friends all so deeply, especially since I've had most of my friends now for years and years. But to be put into situations like the current one I'm in, it makes it hard to feel like any of it is worth it.
And then that just makes me feel like a hipocrite. Why? Because I've been missing and thinking about Mr. X (formerly Douchey) and it's weird. I felt like I had let go, finally, and was moving on, finally. And then it seems like *poof* there he is again in my head and my dreams. *sigh* I don't know. Maybe it'll help to just remember that he moved on. He's gone from my life for a reason, right? Gotta be strong.
Oh but speaking of dreams, I had some weird dreams last night. But I bought a journal to keep track of my dreams. I'm making short stories out of them. So far, I have three! Its absolutely awesome to be writing in that sense again. I can't believe how much I've missed it so. Hopefully it turns out well. So far my stories are liked. That's a big plus.
And I guess speaking of Mr. X, and reading a reader's blog, and thinking of my current situation with some friends, I've been listening to this song alot. Enjoy.